Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Two Broke Brooms - The Ceremony

There are so many important elements to a wedding. The location, the food, the dress, the rings, the flowers, the guest book; the list goes on and on. However, at the center of all these facets lies one crucial thing: actually getting married. In other words, this month’s topic is the actual marriage ceremony itself.  There are hundreds of traditions and possibilities to sort through, but we found this aspect of planning a nice break from the more budget intensive decisions.

The unity candle from a wedding Thryn and Gabe attended last summer. This is a tradition Gabe and Thryn toyed with but ultimately decided against.

We broke the planning of the ceremony up into two sections; walking down the aisle and the vows. Walking down the aisle was probably the more fun aspect of planning, so we’ll start there.
As a disclaimer neither of us have been to many traditional weddings, so many of the more classical traditions we learned through media or in slightly altered forms. We knew right off the bat that while wanted our family to be involved in our walking down the aisle, we did not want our fathers to “give us away.” It was in discussing whether we wanted “Broom's people” (groomsmen/bridesmaids) that we came with an idea as to how to incorporate our families without utilizing a patriarchal tradition. Instead of having brooms people precede us down the aisle, we plan to have our family fill that role. We’ll begin with our siblings, and then progress to our parents, and finally we’ll walk down the aisle hand in hand.

After we’d settle on logistics, we discussed what we’d be walking down the aisle to. Thryn pretty much refused to walk down the aisle to anything by Wagner, so the traditional “here comes the bride” was out. Instead, we settle on the Promenade from Pictures at an Exhibit by Modest Mussorgsky. As a promenade, it is easy to keep in step with and it is just long enough that we will be able to use the whole piece without likely needing to repeat it.  Our dear friends will still be a part of our “wedding party” though. Since there will be so few people at the wedding itself, we’ve decided to describe all those present at it as our wedding party. They’ll all be invited to the rehearsal dinner and, of course, have a place of honor at our reception. 

One tradition we’re considering is stepping on a glass at the end of the vows, which is traditionally down by the bride(s) in a Jewish wedding. Pictured is Thryn’s mom and stepmom breaking a glass at their wedding

One of our friends will have an especially honored roll, though, as our officiant!  The vows part of our ceremony is still something we’re working out the details of. Thryn is currently working on converting to Judaism and isn’t entirely sure yet how much of their new faith they want to include. What we do know is, the choice of our officiant started off as a joke and then grew into an idea we really loved. Natalie, our friend and future officiant, was Thryn’s very first girlfriend. Of course being young and new to romance, Thryn had the idea that some someday Natalie would marry them, and now she will be; just in a very different sense. There is something that feels deeply symbolic about an old friend and lover being the person who officiates and blesses your marriage in that way. It’s renewing while still connecting deeply to your own romantic past. 

We’ll be writing our own vows, that admittedly we’ve been working on since we first said “I love you.” This ceremony will be far from traditional, and that’s completely all right with us. 

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